Male Epidemic is Happening
(Right before my eyes—and I’m here for it.)
Dating in the 21st century is not for the faint of heart, and the elder people still think that picking the right guy is easy nowadays. I'm a woman in my mid 20s, and I'm going to tell you something: It's a SCAM.
Since when did we start thinking that having a boyfriend is not a privilege anymore? Since Vogue started writing about it? NO. Rightful women have been shouting this truth since the suffragettes fought for the vote in the early 1900s. Since Simone de Beauvoir wrote The Second Sex in 1949, declaring that "one is not born, but rather becomes, a woman." And also, since the second-wave feminists of the 1960s and 70s challenged the notion that marriage and motherhood were women's only paths to fulfillment.
This isn't new. This is history finally catching up to what women have known all along. But I'm glad that this generation is vocally applying it. And I will always live for it. Because women are waking up. We're looking around and realizing that being single isn't the crisis we were told it would be. The real crisis is settling for someone who sees you as an option, not a priority. And shrinking yourself to fit into someone else's half-baked vision of a relationship.
But the point is, the male epidemic isn't that there aren't enough men. It's that there aren't enough men who've done the work—emotional, psychological, financial—to be actual partners. And for the first time in history, women have the economic independence and social permission to say: "I'd rather be alone than accept less than I deserve."
And you know what's beautifully ironic? For decades, we were told our biological clocks were ticking, that we needed to settle down before we became "expired goods." Meanwhile, men could take their time, sow their wild oats, mature at their own pace. But now? We, WOMEN, are thriving in our careers, building our own wealth, creating chosen families, and living full lives—with or without a partner. We're freezing our eggs, adopting, or choosing to remain child-free altogether. But suddenly, there's a scramble. Suddenly, men are writing think pieces about the "crisis of male loneliness." They're now realizing that being a decent human being isn't optional; it's the bare minimum requirement.
I sometimes ask myself, “Do I hate men?.” And the answer is always a NO. I don't hate men. I actually love the good ones. The ones who've done therapy. The ones who split housework without being asked. The ones who see women as full human beings, not as accessories to their lives or solutions to their problems. Those men? They're definitely thriving too. They're in healthy, equal partnerships and certainly not part of the epidemic. But the rest? The ones still operating on outdated scripts, expecting women to be their mothers, therapists, maids, and ego-boosters all wrapped into one? They're facing a reckoning.
So NO, elder generation, it's not easy to find "the right guy" nowadays. But you know what? That's not our problem to solve by lowering our standards. That's not our failure for being "too picky." The male epidemic is real. And the cure isn't women settling. The cure is men rising to meet us where we are: whole, complete, and not desperate for just anyone—but open to the right one.
Until then? I'm living my best life. Building my career. Investing in my friendships. Traveling. Creating. Thriving.
Male epidemic is happening. And I hope we are not just living with it, but rather, we should be thriving in it. (Wink wink)